Thursday, May 24, 2012

What Is In A Dream


I have an announcement. I am crazy. Good Night Everybody!!! Seriously, we can't just end on a crazy announcement can we? That would be kind of like CSI: Miami ending after that one guy puts on the sunglasses. We can't have that now can we. I have been meaning to write this, but I keep putting it off because I think procrastination is somewhat fun. My high school English teacher would be pissed. Why put off today, what you can do tomorrow. Every night for the last three years I have laid my head down to drift off to a land that is visited by Peter Pan. I love me some peanut butter. I am ready for a night of deep sleep. I was always told that if you tell your dreams before you eat they wouldn't come true or it is the other way around. Hell, I give up trying to figure out these superstitions by the elderly. It is not the easiest thing in the world. I keep having the same dream over and over and over. It seriously is like being locked in a room watching the Events Calendar channel on the television. If any of you can tell me what this dream means or know a Shaman, I would be gladly appreciated and the terrorist will not win.

I dream that I am part of a sitcom. There are three guys named Larry, Darryl, Darryl. We work in some lodge thing and I have no idea how I got there. After 6 or 7 years, I wake up and realize it was all a dream. Shit, sorry that was Newhart. My bad

The real dream people. I am in the magical country music town of Branson Missouri. I normally wouldn't brag about that. Wait a sec, I am really not even now. I am at the Branson Landing. It is an outdoor mall. They honest to God have the coolest damn store in the world. The As Seen On Tv Store!!! I got a Gopher from there. Remember that grabber thing Billy Mays sold? I had one. I am lonely, don't judge me. Well, the dream starts at The Bass Pro Shops on the Landing. There is not a soul around. I start walking to see if anyone is there. All of a sudden, a penny comes rolling by me. It seems to be rolling at a pace that I can follow it very easily. I follow the penny, passing store after store. We end up at the part that looks over the water. I see myself with a woman. I can see the back of her. I have no clue what she looks like. I am guessing she is cute. I mean look at me. I am one sexy piece of man meat. The fire show begins and I am proposing to her. I try to move to see what she looks like as soon as I get close I wake up.

I keep waking up in the same damn spot. What does this all mean? Am I supposed to somehow marry Yakov, or get it on with The Oak Ridge Boys. Is she the girl? Will the dream end when I meet her face to face? I guess until then, I will be playing with my Baldknobbers.

I apologize for the Branson references. I couldn't help myself.

2 comments:

Jim Dick said...

I think this points to you performing comedy to the elderly population at the Richard Isaak White Trash Theatre on the strip.

Richard Pruitt said...

Wouldn't that be all shows in branson?